Eloge: Zeno, 2002-2007
Zeno, openly adored cat of his primary caretaker Alex and surreptitiously loved step-cat of Ellen, died suddenly and tragically on Saturday evening, a victim of vehicular cat-slaughter. He is also survived by his canine sister, Shelley, of the home.
Zeno, resting near Shelley’s tail. Photo taken in his last days.
Although Zeno was a fairly consistently surly cat, and was known to bite at the least provocation, he nonetheless found a place in our hearts and was, along with Shelley, at the center of our household.
We already miss him terribly: we miss his habit of sitting outside my office window yowling; we miss the way he would blow us off by turning tail, hitching up his little butt, and stalking out of the room in a huff; we miss his grudging affection; we miss the sounds of murderous frustration he would make upon seeing a bird or squirrel he couldn’t hunt down and kill.
We miss his clear-eyed assessment of the Lee Harvey Oswald conundrum.
We miss his lithe and compact physicality.
But most of all, we miss his conversation. As Yvor Winters said of Hart Crane, “I would gladly emulate Odysseus and go down to the shadows for another hour’s conversation with him…” Granted, Zeno’s responses were mainly limited to “mrak” and “hell-whoa,” but the astonishing range of meaning and expression that he wrung out of those two vocalizations will long live in our hearts.
Our hearts which today are as wintry as this tree:
Our plan for the week is to cry a lot.
Our greatest hope is that he has been reunited with his derelict truck in the Great Beyond.
It ain’t heaven if it ain’t got no derelict truck.
Zeno will go to his final resting place tonight. In lieu of flowers, we ask that you feed your favorite cat a full can of Fancy Feast this evening. Zeno would have wanted it that way.
Rest in peace, Mr. Kitty.
February 26th, 2007 at 6:40 pm
Oh, I’m so sorry to hear of this. Please accept my condolences. This must leave such a hole in your household. Poor kitty 🙁
February 26th, 2007 at 6:48 pm
Oh Alex (and surreptitiously Ellen); I am SO sorry for your loss. I am mourning with you.
February 26th, 2007 at 6:53 pm
My deepest sympathies to all three of you. We’ve had a couple of very close calls with my black & white cat, and it’s very difficult. We’ll give our cats some extra hugs tonight for you.
February 26th, 2007 at 6:55 pm
Oh no! I’m so sorry. 🙁
February 26th, 2007 at 7:47 pm
Thank you so much, everyone. Tell you the truth, we just feel awful.
February 26th, 2007 at 8:33 pm
Yeah, it’s just really hard to accept that he won’t be around to meow at us every morning, or demand to sit in my lap while I work, or any of the other things he did which were endearing and slightly annoying, but in a pleasant way. It’s just miserable and it’s SO hard to think about how he’s really gone. It has been a miserable month on the whole — one bad thing after another — but this really pushes it over the edge. It was just so, so awful to find him like that. Hug your loved ones tight. I really feel like I lost a good friend.
February 26th, 2007 at 8:54 pm
Oh, Ellen and Alex, I am so sorry to hear of your loss! A pet is more than just an animal that lives in your house, they are a part of the family, best friend, substitute child, and confidante. I still have a big hole in my heart from losing my beloved dog of 18 years, Schatze, 11 years ago. Hug each other for me, and give Shelly some extra hugs, she’s probably missing Zeno, too.
February 26th, 2007 at 9:36 pm
Oh, my…shocking! I’m terribly sorry. I just don’t know what to say. Just, I’m sorry. Amazing how these animals become our families.
February 26th, 2007 at 11:25 pm
Oh crap. Well, I’m off to open some Fancy Feast.
February 26th, 2007 at 11:39 pm
Oh I am so sorry.
February 27th, 2007 at 12:59 am
I am so sorry for your loss. Just a second ago I was aggravated at my dog for being hyper, but now I think I’ll go give her a huge hug. My thoughts are with you.
February 27th, 2007 at 6:47 am
I’m so sorry hear of your loss. We had a cat that insisted on playing chicken with every car that came down our lane, needless to say one day he lost 🙁 I still miss him
February 27th, 2007 at 9:21 am
Oh, I’m sorry to hear this 🙁 I love how you described him as ‘consistently surly.’
February 27th, 2007 at 9:47 am
It’s amazing how our animals insinuate themselves into our hearts, isn’t it? I had a therapist who told me once that the quality of grief you experience when you lose an animal is much the same as when you lose a (human) loved one, but the grief typically doesn’t go on as long. Small comfort now, I know.
I’m thinking about you two.
February 27th, 2007 at 2:01 pm
Oh, Ellen! I’m so terribly, terribly sorry!!! Losing a cat is so hideous (even if he was a pain, he was YOUR pain!) I’m at a total loss for words – but my kitties will be well-fed tonight!
February 27th, 2007 at 6:22 pm
Oh, no, not Zeno! He was too young to go. Seriously, I feel by reading your blog I’ve gotten to know your cats as family. Is that too weird? I’ll miss him too. Much hugging to our man-cat about the house tonight.
February 27th, 2007 at 7:38 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss. We lost a siamese not too long ago, and I still tear up when I think about him. As with your Zeno, he was so expressive in voice and body language. Such a vocabulary! I will definately be cracking open the canned tonight in Zeno’s honor, and will think of all of you.
February 27th, 2007 at 7:48 pm
Tuna is my cats’ canned treat of choice, so I’ll be opening some up for them this evening. Of course they won’t understand that it is in honor of a fallen brother, but they will thoroughly enjoy it.
February 27th, 2007 at 11:33 pm
Alex & Ellen,
I’m so sorry for your loss. It is amazing how the furry among us manage to wangle their way deep into our hearts, even if they’re a bit surly about it. Cats are the worst. They make you feel like they’re doing you a favor when they let you clean out their litterbox. Extra hugs and treats for my three tonight. Hope you feel better soon.
aaa
February 28th, 2007 at 5:29 pm
Wow, I was just away for a couple of days. I’m so sorry, Ellen. I know it can be devastating to lose a kitty (even one for whom your own affections were somewhat ambivalent). I went back and looked at Zeno curled up next to Alex when the furnace came back on.
I always love that Isak Dinesen line (might well be her quoting someone else, come to think of it) about how god made the horizon flat because we are not meant to see too far into the future. So, so true.
February 28th, 2007 at 9:22 pm
Even I will miss this independent critter, who brought joy to those around him. Zeno was certainly one of a kind. Thanks to digital photography and our memories only the good will thoughts will remain. I know that Alex, Ellen and Shelly will be very sad for a very long time. Sherlock and DaD
March 3rd, 2007 at 4:53 am
Oh, poor kitty! I’m sorry to hear about Zeno’s death. My thoughts are with you and Alex.
March 18th, 2007 at 9:11 am
Oh guys… I’m *so* sorry. Belatedly, but terribly sorry. {{{{{{{{{Alex, Ellen and Shelley}}}}}}}}}} I lost my beloved Siamese Lu Ahng suddenly, over 30 years ago, and I still start crying when I think of her. I’m going to miss Zeno; I loved seeing him appear on the blog as much as I do Shelley. I’m glad I got a chance to know him.
May Zeno be there to greet you when you go on your own journeys. (Mind you, in a surly tone, no doubt, with complaints about how late you are – but glad to be reunited.)
March 30th, 2007 at 4:38 am
I’m so sorry, Ellen. Billie died not two years ago and I don’t feel like I’ll ever recover. I’m very glad to see how happy you are with the rest of life, though. I’ve been enjoying your website unobtrusively for months and would have continued to keep my head down if not for the need to respond to your sadness. Take good care, and congratulations and best of everything to you and Alex.